Thanksgiving has taken an even greater meaning to my family since the accident.  The crash happened two days after Thanksgiving.  Since then we have used this day to celebrate that we are still together.  It is one of the happiest days of the year for me.  December 1st always seems cold and dark to me.   Today though I feel alive.  I walked the Turkey Trot in pouring down rain and I did it faster than last year.  Our house smells like roasting turkey.  The kids are watching the Thanksgiving parades on TV.  Soon friends and family will be at our home drinking wine and having fun.  Truth be told, I am also really looking forward to my post-meal nap.  A tradition that dates back years but has taken significant importance now that walking a 5K race feels like a half marathon use too.

This year I am most thankful for how far I have come in the last three years.  Three years ago I felt like I had the world in the palm of my hand.  The economy was awesome,  real estate was “easy”.  Dagmar, our super, awesome aupair was still living with us.  My family life was running like a well oiled machine.  I was looking forward to my first Christmas in 13 years not in retail.  So much changed so quickly.  17 days later I was woken from my coma to find that my world was turned upside down.  While I laid in my nursing home bed unable to move the outside world around me began to fall apart.  First the stock market.  Then the real estate market.  I stared at a tack on the wall trying to deal with my pain as everything I knew kept collapsing around me.  It was then that I first started to realize that the only thing I truly needed was my family.

Three years later I no longer desire to own the world.  I am just happy to be of it.  I have lived through a roller coaster of issues and emotions and I finally feel like I am getting off the ride.  I continue to have health issues and life can really stress me out, but no matter what life throws at us, my family and I have been through worse and survived.

I plan to let a lot of people know about my blog today.  Up until this point I have struggled to share our story in the written word.  This is an issue since I also have a couple hundred page book that I wrote that I need to find a publisher for as well as a national magazine that just wrote a feature story about my recovery that comes out in February.

I thank God that I still have my wonderful family and that I am well enough to enjoy them.  I try not to look to far into the future anymore but when I look at my past three years I really have come a very long way simply by living one day at a time.


Embrace The Pain

Hebrews 12: 11-13

No discipline seems pleasant at the time, but painful.  Later on, however, it produces a harvest of righteousness and peace for those who have been trained by it.  Therefore, strengthen your feeble arms and weak knees. “Make level the paths for your feet,” so that the lame may not be disabled, but rather healed.

First time standing

I first read these verses, last December.  I was about one month into rebuilding my body and was very close to quitting.  These words pushed me through.  It was at this point that the mantra that got me through my time at the nursing home, “embrace the pain”, took an even deeper, more spiritual meaning.

These verses popped up again in August as the second reading at Mass.  I hadn’t given them much thought in the past 6 months.  So much had changed since I first read those words 8 months earlier.  Thinking about where I was back then and how far I had come gave me an immediate sense of peace. This peace is truly a gift.  When challenges and difficulty arise in my life reading these verses help me to re-focus.

I read Hebrews 12 this evening again.  I feel a lot better…